Showing posts with label CBT. Show all posts
Showing posts with label CBT. Show all posts

Monday, December 3, 2012

Mental Illness and Self Identity

Since the book contest has been going on for a week (congrats winners!) I have not been blogging, but now my ideas are running amok so it's time to put down on paper what's swirling around my mind.

I have been getting a lot of questions about the new changes to the BPD diagnosis in the DSM5 coming out in May 2013, which was just finalized this weekend.  The new diagnostic criteria for BPD in my opinion is vague and covers too many people.   But what if looking at the current criteria, and after years of therapy, DBT, CBT, therapy, heck even EMDR therapy you now meet 1 or 2 of the criteria when 5 or more criteria equals a Borderline Personality Diagnosis?  Well, first off you no longer have a BPD diagnosis (per the DSM IV-r) but does this make you "cured?"

"Recovery may seem like an illusory concept. We still know very little about what this process is like for people with severe mental illness. Yet many recent intervention studies have in fact measured elements of recovery, even though the recovery process went unmentioned. Recovery is a multidimensional concept: there is no single measure of recovery, but many different measures that estimate various aspects of it. The recovery vision expands our concept of service outcome to include such dimensions as self-esteem, adjustment to disability, empowerment, and self-determination. However, it is the concept of recovery, and not the many ways to measure it, that ties the various components of the field into a single vision. For service providers, recovery from mental illness is a vision commensurate with researchers’ vision of curing and preventing mental illness. Recovery is a simple yet powerful vision  (Anthony, 1991.)"

I have worked with many people whom were diagnosed with a mental illness, and though therapy, groups and sometimes medications, were doing better; holding down jobs, attending college, making friends and felt like they were lost for a while, "I have been Bipolar for so long who am I now?"  I think this mindset can be especially true for some with BPD, since the therapy is so intensive and the community is so tight-knit.

Take for instance a client I worked with whom had Bipolar disorder with psychotic symptoms; he had been attending NAMI groups for years, most of his friends were from the mental health clinic I worked at, his calendar was filled with Bipolar workshops, meetings, and events he had been attending for years.  After years of therapy and medication he was still attending these events and at some point I told him he was the poster child for "Bipolar Success."  He was confused by this term "success," he asked, "am I cured?"  I opened the DSM IV-r and read through the criteria for his current diagnosis- he meet 2, when 5 was needed.  After I assured him that he was not going to be dropped from services due to this (oh, insurance woes,) we spoke about if he should continue to spend 20 hours a week surrounded by those with a mental illness he no longer has? Should he drop all his friends? Was it appropriate to discuss at NAMI meetings issues surrounding a mental illness he no longer has? Should he tell people?

After a 50 minute session and a follow up phone call (he was "freaking out!") we decided his plan of action; it is okay to continue the relationships he has created, he can be a role model for others regarding what recovery looks like; attending NAMI meetings-okay BUT new doors are now open he didn't think were when he was diagnosed before; college classes, a healthy relationship (he was too embarrassed prior to have one,) and  full-time employment over collecting disability.  He was (understandably) so attached to his identity that he didn't know who he was without it.

I understand this isn't the case for all people with Mental Illness, as some hide their mental illness from others, are not properly diagnosed and some even avoid the reality of their illness.

Here is a great list of people's stories regarding their mental illness recovery Connections: Stories of Recovery from Mental Illness:


"Today, LeRoy doesn't see any doctor for therapy. He sees his doctor simply to refill his prescription when needed. His treated Delusional Schizophrenia affects him as much as treated diabetes or high blood pressure would. He takes responsibility for it, and life goes on.  "I take my pill at bedtime. I haven't really had any side effects," he says.  But perhaps there has been a side effect his job. As a survivor of a mental illness, LeRoy realized he now has a responsibility not only for his own recovery, but for the healing of others. So he's made a career of it. LeRoy helps other people with mental illnesses, called clients, as they walk their own road to recovery.  He says he may be making less money than he set out to earn, but he's helping more people than he ever thought he could.   In addition to mentoring and supporting people with mental illnesses, LeRoy tries to teach the public about mental health issues. He speaks to churches, schools, and practically any group or individual who wants to hear about the bravery of those who battle mental illness.  It's easy for LeRoy to talk about bravery, because it's bravery that helps him accept himself, accept his diagnosis, and go forward.  "You can't deal with your mental illness until you can agree with yourself that, 'Hey, I have a mental illness so I need to be responsible and take care of it.' "  He's brave. He's responsible. He's taken care of it. LeRoy Simmons is a survivor, (pg. 13.)"
 I would love feedback from anyone who no longer meets the criteria for BPD regarding how they got recovery and how (if at all) their identify was wrapped up in their diagnosis.


Saturday, December 1, 2012

Book Contest Winners!

*The e-books were e-mailed out today and the other 2 books were ordered and will arrive shortly*

I am happy to announce the winners, whom  all have been notified.  I received 53 entries and had 12 winners in total- twice as much as November's contest.  Some of you entered here and on twitter and a few daily.  Below are the winners.  If you won Buddha and the Borderline or Gift of Imperfection please e-mail (alicia.paz.ma(at)gmail.com) or DM on twitter your physical address so I can have it shipped to you via Amazon.  I will send the e-books and 2 other books out once I get everyone's e-mail and physical addresses- hopefully Monday.) I abbreviated all names listed below for privacy.

Stop Sabotaging: 31 Day DBT Challenge to Change Your Life

  • Stephanie J (Blogger)
  • Jennifer C (Blogger)
  • Paul K (Twitter)
  • Tee B (Twitter/Blogger)
  • Befuddled N (Twitter)
  • The Guy... (Twitter)
  • HeavensP (Blogger)
  • Rhonda (Blogger)
  • Cass (Blogger
  • Dltd (Blogger)

The Buddha and the Borderline

  • MsStitch (Twitter)

The Gift of Imperfection

  • Stephanie E (Twitter/Blogger)


Wednesday, November 21, 2012

November Book Giveaway

Update: After seeing all the lovely comment's about Debbie Corso's work I have decided to give away 10 copies of her book instead of 5

It was a great success last month, with 5 people winning Debbie Corso's last book (1 person even paid it forward giving away another 5 copies!)  On November 30th her new book Stop Sabotaging a 30 Day DBT Challenge to Change Your Life will be available for purchase on Smashwords.

And I am happy to announce I am the introduction writer!

Starting on Friday November 23rd at 11:59pm until Friday November 30th at 11:59pm I will be giving away 10 copies of Debbie's new book as well as 1 copy of Brene Brown's The Gifts of Imperfection: Let Go of Who You Think You're Supposed to Be and Embrace Who You Are and the 1 copy of Buddha and The Borderline



There are 2 ways to win one of *10* of Debbie Corso's book:
1) Leave a comment here with an e-mail address stating which book your prefer
2) Become a fan of my twitter then tweet: "Just entered to win 1 of 10 copies of Stop Sabotaging by Debbie Corso.  Follow @APazMA and RT to enter #BPD #DBT"

There are 2 ways to win the other 2 books:

1) Leave a comment here with an e-mail address stating which book you prefer. 
2) Become a fan of my twitter then tweet: "Just entered to win 1 of 5 copies of (book title).  Follow @APazMA and RT to enter #BPD #DBT"












Rules: After I receive 200 entries or by 11/30/2012 at 11:59pm EST, whichever comes first I will contact the 7 winners and ask for an e-mail address for those on twitter so I can "gift" the Stop Sabotaging e-book to you.  I will not use your e-mail address for anything else besides sending the book and an e-mail confirming the book was sent if there are any issues.  If I can not get in touch with any winner within a week (and I will try my hardest to do so) I will give the remaining book(s) to another contestant.  The winners of the other 3 books will need to send me their physical address to have the book shipped from Amazon via DM on twitter or e-mail.  The winners will be selected at random from my blog and twitter.  2 entries per person per day allowed (1 on here and 1 on twitter, so 14 total max.) Failure to comply with rules, such as tweeting your entry more than once a day will make you disqualified.  If you have questions tweet me!

Please play fair as I plan on doing this once a month with different books I purchase.  Next month I might give away Linehan's DBT workbook & 3 months of DBT coaching for the holidays....will update!


Monday, November 12, 2012

Dealing with trauma issues with BPD

Although the DSM IV-r criteria for Borderline Personality Disorder does not include trauma, it is often a common thread in those with the disorder.  Often on Twitter I see a tweet started with "TW" (trigger warning) before something that may be triggering, it's a safety boundary for many in the BPD community.  In DBT we strictly enforce the rules about saying things that can be triggers, sometimes those who don't have BPD don't realize how harmful what they say can be, sometimes people try to stir up some drama and some are so disconnected from their trauma they don't understand how someone could be hurt by what they are saying.
Adults with borderline personality disorder (BPD) showed excessive emotional reactions when looking at words with unpleasant meanings compared to healthy people during an emotionally stimulating task, according to NIMH-funded researchers. They also found that people with more severe BPD showed a greater difference in emotional responding compared to people with less severe BPD. The study was published in the August 1, 2007, issue ofBiological Psychiatry[source]

This week myself and a client came to the conclusion that talking about her trauma only continues to hurt her more than help her.  Creating a boundary became necessary since other clients continue to push her to speak about the horrific trauma thinking that like them she needs to "get it out and give it away." In group she announced this decision and the overall look was puzzled, so we decided to allow questions as this appeared to go against everything they have been taught since being in therapy.  The questions were in 3 categories; 1) doesn't keeping it in, keep us sick? 2) How does talking about it make it worse? 3) So what are you going to talk about then?  The group decided to respect her boundary, although they were skeptical.  I decided to not go into the details of Borderline Personality Disorder since the client had told me she was not comfortable with that.

The end question was then "Ms. Paz, how is she going to work on her trauma issues without talking about it?"  I spoke about working on how the trauma affects you now; relationship issues, boundaries, PTSD symptoms and focusing on coping skills and grounding techniques instead of living in the past.  The group was still unsure about this plan as it goes against what they have (thought) they have known for most their life.  HEre are some ways to work on your trauma without talking about the trauma [source]

1. Tell yourself that you are having a flashback  
2. Remind yourself that the worst is over.  The feelings and sensations you are experiencing are memories of the past.  The actual event has already occurred and you survived. Now it is the time to let out the terror, rage, hurt, and/or panic.  Now is the time to honor your experience.  
3. Get grounded.  This means stamping your feet on the ground to remind yourself that you have feet and can get away now if you need to.  (There may have been times before when you could not get away, now you can.)  Being aware of all five senses can also help you ground yourself.  
4. Breathe.  When we get scared we stop normal breathing.  As a result our body begins to panic from the lack of oxygen.  Lack of oxygen in itself causes a great deal of panic feelings; pounding in the head, tightness, sweating, feeling faint, shakiness, and dizziness.  When we breathe deeply enough, a lot of the panic feeling can decrease.  Breathing deeply means putting your hand on your diaphragm, pushing against your hand, and then exhaling so the diaphragm goes in.  
5. Reorient to the present.  Begin to use your five senses in the present.  Look around and see the colors in the room, the shapes of things, the people near, etc.  Listen to the sounds in the room:  your breathing, traffic, birds, people, cars, etc.  Feel your body and what is touching it: your clothes, your own arms and hands, the chair, or the floor supporting you.  
6. Get in touch with your need for boundaries.  Sometimes when we are having a flashback we lose the sense of where we leave off and the world begins; as if we do not have skin.  Wrap yourself in a blanket, hold a pillow or stuffed animal, go to bed, sit in a closet, any way that you can feel yourself truly protected from the outside.  
7. Get support.  Depending on your situation you may need to be alone or may want someone near you.  In either case it is important that your close ones know about flashbacks so they can help with the process, whether that means letting you be by yourself or being there.  
8. Take the time to recover.  Sometimes flashbacks are very powerful. Give yourself time to make the transition form this powerful experience. Don't expect yourself to jump into adult activities right away.  Take a nap, a warm bath, or some quiet time.  Be kind and gentle with yourself.  Do not beat yourself up for having a flashback.  
9. Honor your experience.  Appreciate yourself for having survived that horrible time.  Respect your body's need to experience a full range of feelings.  
10. Be patient.  It takes time to heal the past.  It takes time to learn appropriate ways of taking care of yourself, of being an adult who has feelings, and developing effective ways of coping in the here and now.
 Stay safe.
AP

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Borderline Personality Disorder and Hallucinations

I often (maybe too often) talk about the misdiagnosis of those with BPD and along with many other diagnosis I find those with BPD have been diagnosed with Schizoaffective Disorder due to the hallucinations.  Part of this I believe is also the disassociation those with Borderline Personality Disorder deal with from past trauma. The term Borderline came from the original belief that those with BPD were  on the border between psychosis and neurosis.  Although this is no longer the belief, some still suffer with the psychosis elements.  

[source] A study of 171 Borderline personality disorder (BPD) patients revealed that 29.2% reported hallucinations. Most patients expressed that the hallucinations were distressing, occurred with great frequency over prolonged periods, took control of actions or behavior (especially, self-harming behavior) and had a critical quality. Although the majority of hallucinations were auditory, visual and olfactory hallucinations were also reported.





Hallucinations: Coping Strategies [source]
When voices are distressing, some patients may self-adjust their prescription medications or use drugs or alcohol to minimize the hallucinations. But there are better ways to deal with this issue.
  • Fighting back. This technique involves yelling or talking back to the hallucinations. While resisting the voices may seem like a good idea, studies show that the "fight or flight" response can lead to depression, since the voices typically don't go away on their own.
  • Passive acceptance. Although accepting that the voices are part of life for a person with schizophrenia seems to have more positive emotional effects, some argue that the danger of acceptance is that the hallucinations may start to consume your life.
  • Mindfulness techniques. In a trial of a therapy called Acceptance and Commitment, participants significantly reduced the effects of their symptoms, and had slightly fewer re-hospitalizations, than a control group using traditional therapy. With this philosophy, the patient agrees to acknowledge the voices but does not agree to accept guidance from them.
For coping with delusions, not all strategies work for every person, and many people report using more than one strategy.
  • Distraction. Focusing on a task, reciting numbers, taking a nap, or watching television can help distract the person from delusional, often paranoid, thoughts. A recent study showed that the choice of distraction is important. Researchers found that choosing favorite music or a news program was a more effective distraction tool than white noise. The study also reported that a personal music player with headphones might be the best way to listen to music when trying to ignore delusions. Headphones minimize other distractions, and people who used them tended to stick with this technique even after the study was completed.
  • Asking for help. Some people with schizophrenia seek out the company of friends and family when they are experiencing delusions. Friends and family can help by providing a distracting activity, or even just a listening ear.
  • Religion and meditative activities. People who are religious believers report using prayer or meditation to help deal with their active schizophrenia symptoms. Yoga, exercise, or walking can also shift the focus from the delusions and provide a sense of calm.
  • Be selective. Some voices are positive and some voices are negative. An organization called Hearing Voices takes an interesting approach: The voices may not be physical beings, but they should still treat you with the respect that you expect from other people. This group recommends engaging with the voices, but politely. The patient should ask the voices to make an appointment, or tell the negative voices that they are not welcome until they have useful information.



Thursday, October 25, 2012

Boundary Garden

Those with Borderline Personality Disorder struggle with healthy boundary setting.  From my perspective this is part of their black/white, all/nothing thinking.  Sometimes it's obvious when someone has poor boundaries. The story I always tell to describe what poor, or low boundaries look like is this personal one from when I was 15 years old.  I had just walked off the city bus to walk to go home, as did another classmate I had not seen before.  It was the first week in school, so I guessed she might be new.  I began talking to her, figuring if nothing else it would give me someone to walk home from school with.  Our walk and only conversation lasted 8 minutes and in it she told me her mother had killed herself, she was now living with her father, he didn't know how to cook, was "icked" out buying her tampons, she had an array of mental health issues, told me what medications she was on and showed me scars from when she tried killing herself a few months back.  My radar went into the red danger zone and I immediately knew this was not someone I would want to be friends with, even if it was 16 minutes a day round trip.


Those with all/nothing thinking struggle with making, having and often keeping friends for this primary reason; "they are either my all-time best friend or my worst enemy."  This was a quote from a client, whom I didn't at the time know much about BPD to diagnosis.  I have my clients create boundary gardens to illustrate this point and have a visual for where their friends lay.  Below is the outline of the garden I have them fill in.

Here is an example of one filled in for someone who has low boundaries,
After I have the clients fill in the garden I ask a few questions; which section has the most people in it? Why are people in old brush and not out of the garden? Is there anyone who has been moved towards the old brush or into roses since starting therapy/group/recovery?  It's a great starting point for creating and enforcing boundaries.  I also have the clients put lines where they would like to move people, for example, "my step mom and I have had a better relationship the last few years since she stopped drinking, so maybe it's time to have her as a violet," or "My brother is a close friend now, but I think he has been stealing money from my purse, so maybe we need more distance and he needs to be moved to Geraniums."

It doesn't solve their boundary issues, but it gives them a starting point and a nice visual to begin working on.

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

BPD and Self Harm Syndrome

Working in a prison, the inmates wear short sleeves at all times (they do have coats they can wear outside and thermals for underneath their shirts at times), and due to my specialty with BPD I find myself often looking down at inmate arms for scars.  I haven't taken any kind of survey, but easily a quarter of the clients, whom are not necessarily mental health clients have scars.  They are quick to tell me the last time they cut, "it's been 2 years," "this was before I was locked up," mostly because they can be sent to segregation for these "dangerous" behaviors and suicidal actions (per the prison).  There is a huge rate of self-harm in those with Borderline Personality Disorder, as well as those with other mental health diagnosis.  There has been a push to create a diagnosis for those whom self-harm called Self Harm Syndrome. 


Favazza and Rosenthal, in a 1993 article in Hospital and Community Psychiatry, suggest defining self-injury as a disease and not merely a symptom. They created a diagnostic category called Repetitive Self-Harm Syndrome.The diagnostic criteria for Repetitive Self-Harm Syndrome include:
  • preoccupation with physically harming oneself
  • repeated failure to resist impulses to destroy or alter one's body tissue
  • increasing tension right before, and a sense of relief after, self-harm
  • no association between suicidal intent and the act of self-harm
  • not a response to mental retardation, delusion, hallucination
Miller (1994) suggests that many self-harmers suffer from what she calls Trauma Reenactment Syndrome.As described in Women Who Hurt ThemselvesTRS sufferers have four common characteristics:
  • a sense of being at war with their bodies ("my body, my enemy")
  • excessive secrecy as a guiding principle of life
  • inability to self-protect (often seen in a specific kind of fragmentation of self
  • relationships dominated by a struggle for control.
Miller proposes that women who've been traumatized suffer a sort of internal split of consciousness; when they go into a self-harming episode, their conscious and subconscious minds take on three roles:
  • the abuser (the one who harms)
  • the victim
  • the non-protecting bystander
Favazza, Alderman, Herman (1992) and Miller suggest that, contrary to popular therapeutic opinion, there is hope for those who self-injure. Whether self-injury occurs in tandem with another disorder or alone, there are effective ways of treating those who harm themselves and helping them find more productive ways of coping. source
(Trigger Warning) It's the scars I don't see that worry me the most, the inmates whom have admitted they cut around their genitals as "punishment" for past experiences, which was not their fault.   Those that admit that even a man cat-calling them will give them trauma echo and their first thought it to hurt themselves, as they see themselves as to blame for the situation.  In my experience stopping someone from cutting is a lot harder than taking away the tool.  I meet with a 17 year old while working at a crisis center, whose mom told me he has not cut for a year, since she removed the knives and locked them away.  The young man then raised his shirt and told his mom that he had "found another way," showing her dozens of scars,  Without a new coping skill it is hard to leave an old stand by.  For that matter those who cut state "it works," it distracts from the pain they are feeling and provides temporary relief.  So rather than work on counting days without cutting, here is a list of DBT/CBT skills to do instead of self-harm.  I put my favorite in bold.


99 Coping Skills

  • Exercise (running, walking, etc.)
  • Put on fake tattoos.
  • Write (poetry, stories, journal, etc.)
  • Scribbling on sheets an sheets of paper
  • Be with other people.
  • Watch a favorite TV show.
  • Posting on web boards, and answering others' posts.
  • Go see a movie.
  • Watch a movie from your childhood.
  • Do schoolwork.
  • Play a musical instrument.
  • Paint your nails.
  • Sing.
  • Look up at the sky. (Night is especially beautiful.)
  • Punch a punching bag (with gloves on.)
  • Cover yourself with Band-Aids where you want to cut.
  • Let yourself cry.
  • Sleep (only if you are tired.)
  • Take a hot shower or relaxing bath.
  • Play with a pet.
  • Re-organize your room.
  • Clean.
  • Knit or sew.
  • Read a good book.
  • Listen to music.
  • Watch a candle burn (no playing with the flames!)
  • Meditate.
  • Go somewhere very public.
  • Bake cookies.
  • Alphabetize your CD's.
  • Paint or draw.
  • Ripping paper into itty-bitty pieces
  • Hug someone.
  • Write letters or email.
  • Talk to yourself (or if that feels weird, buy a small tape recorder.)
  • Hug a pillow or stuffed animal.
  • Hyperfocus on something like a rock, hand, etc.
  • Dance.
  • Make hot chocolate.
  • Play with modeling clay or Play-Dough.
  • Build a pillow fort.
  • Go for a nice, long drive.
  • Complete something you've been putting off.
  • Draw on yourself in red marker.
  • Take up a new hobby.
  • Cook a meal.
  • Look at pretty things, like flowers or art.
  • Create something.
  • Pray.
  • Make a list of blessings in your life.
  • Read the Bible.
  • Go to a friend's house.
  • Jump on a trampoline.
  • Watch an old, happy movie.
  • Call a hotline or your therapist.
  • Talk to someone close to you that knows [how you’re suffering.]
  • Ride a bicycle.
  • Feed the ducks, birds, or squirrels, etc.
  • Color with Crayons.
  • Memorize a novel, play, or song.
  • Stretch.
  • Search for ridiculous things on the internet.
  • Hunt for stuff on Ebay or Amazon (you can find ANYTHING there).
  • Color-coordinate your wardrobe.
  • Watch fish.
  • Make a tape of your favorite songs.
  • Play the “15 minute game.” (You can't cut for 15 minutes, and when the time is up, start again.)
  • Plan your wedding / prom / other event.
  • Alphabetize your books.
  • Hunt for your perfect home in the paper.
  • Try to make as many words out of your full name as possible (then do your friends’ names.)
  • Sort all your photographs.
  • Plan a dinner party.
  • Play with a slinky.
  • Find yourself some toys and play.
  • Start collecting something.
  • Play video/computer games.
  • Clean up trash at your local park.
  • Go out and perform a random act of kindness for someone.
  • Call up an old friend.
  • Write yourself an "I love you because…" letter.
  • Try to build something.
  • Rearrange your house.
  • Go through all your old stuff.
  • Smile at least five people.
  • Play with little kids.
  • Go for a walk (with or without a friend.)
  • Go to the mall.
  • Clean your room /closet.
  • Try to do handstands.
  • Try to do cartwheels, bridges, backbends, and such.
  • Teach your pet a new trick.
  • Write a note to a very useful inanimate object thanking it for how useful it’s been.
  • Move EVERYTHING in your room to a new spot.
  • Get together with friends and play Frisbee, soccer or basketball.
  • Randomly go up and hug a friend.
  • Randomly search MySpace music for new music. Or use Pandora.com.
  • Play the "If inanimate objects talked, what would they say?" game.
  • Face paint.
My favorite skills I have utilized with clients is to freeze ice cubes (use red food coloring) and when you feel the urge grab an ice cube and melt it in your hands (over the sink or shower) and watch the red color drip down where you would want to cut. I try not to use foul language, but couldn't resist posting this gem.